Recent reflection regarding the development of my therapeutic skills made me realize that working with children in a variety of roles from babysitting, to teaching, to being a child therapist helped shape my current therapeutic perspectives.
Children’s ability to express through language is limited as so is their ability to understand and or conceptualize abstract notions such as a emotions. Therefore, child therapy focuses on non-verbal, child centered, expressive forms of communication – aka play therapy. In play therapy you just play and you let the child in most cases direct the play and feel safe in just being. I find this simple truth such a beauty.
The question then is, why is playing a game of Connect Four or making play doh turtles so therapeutic? Because rarely is there an adult who allows them to feel safe in expressing exactly who they are without criticism and or judgement, and who relays an energy unconditional regard and yes even love. In play therapy, you simply are lovingly present and this is the magic that I believe heals.
For any therapist that read this, yes I know that there is more that goes on in the playing, and yes with some children depending on their cognitive abilities you can work on helping learn to identify and express emotions. However which do you think has been the most healing, the learning or the being? It is my observed understanding that one has to feel fully safe, accepted, and free let go and just be.
Therefore, the same process becomes true with adults. When one is provided with a space that feels safe and given the ** Genuine ** experience of complete acceptance, unconditional regards and respect is what heals (this can’t be faked because people unconsciously experience your feelings – resonance). It also doesn’t hurt to sprinkle little laughter and lightheartedness in the midst of so much heaviness. Joy is also healing!!
At the end of the day what we all want and crave is to be seen, to be heard, to be understood, accepted, and loved.
They say seeing is believing
Well I see you
therefore I believe in you
