Before self love there is just Love. So let’s start with examining of what love means to you. Take a minute or two to reflect on what love feels and looks like to you. Then ask yourself these two questions:
- What does it mean when I love?
- How do I know when I love?
Most of us will find it easier to define love by how we love. However, those same questions become much more difficult to answer when we are placed at the receiving end.
- How do you know when you are loved?
- What does it mean when you are loved?
Now I am going to challenge you just a nudge more.
- What does it mean to self-love?
- How do you know you love yourself?
Compare your responses for each set – first in how you love, then on how you are loved, and lastly on your self-love. How different were the responses for each of the three categories?
If the nature of love is truly understood then the answer for each of these categories should look nearly identical. Setting aside the different languages of love and the differences in how we show love – love only has one face. Love should feel and look the same whether the love is directed outwards to those we love or inwards towards our self. Self-love in particular, should absolutely look exactly the way we love others. The kindness we give others better be the same kindness you give yourself.
Self-love is the mother of all other forms of love. There isn’t a more truer statement than…….
You can’t love anyone until you love yourself
Anything not birthed from self-love, isn’t love, it’s fear. The relationship we have with ourselves is the relationship we will have with others. Whether you are the empath (AKA self-sacrificing one) in the relationship or the opposite of that – the more self-preserving type, does not make a difference as both are equally fear based.
Love can only flow in the absence of fear.
Love is self sustaining and self fulfilling.
There is a truth in the belief that ‘God’ created us in his/her image. This truth is also inherit in the saying, “as is above so below.” If nothing greater than God exist, nothing greater than God can love God. This is also our truth – that there is no greater love than our connection to the divinity we were created from. That divinity is not separate to us – it the spark of life in us. Although always being there, one can most become conscious of that spark – little bit of lightning that courses through us when we feel joy, or passionately excited about something, and most definitely during orgasm.
Self-love is awakening to the truth that the spark was always yours. To be more clear, not only was the spark always yours but you weren’t just one part of that equation. You aren’t like a matchstick waiting around for the right surface to find you and light you up. If you are alive then you are the spark.
You love yourself because you truly see yourself
The good, the ugly and the godly.
